The first pessimist

Some one wrote:

Love resides in the gap between desire and fulfilment
It breathes in the lack not the contentment
It is the ache, the anticipation, the retreat
Everything around it but the emotion itself.

This is what I wrote back:

Disappointment resides when the gap is never bridged
There is so much lack I cannot breathe
The ache, the anticipation dosen't end
What remains is just a mixed bag of emotions.

I sometimes feel that I was the first pessimist born on this planet. Some would refuse to agree with me on this because I keep up a smiling face most of the time. But, these days, I am a perpetually cribbing woman. I 've always been a pessimist. I have always looked at the negative side of things first. Sometimes this pessimism just surfaces more often compared to other times and these days have been those days. And when the ocean of pessimism inside me is too full, then I indulge in high doses of humor. The child within me comes alive. I crack the silliest of jokes and laugh at myself. Or it is then that I write, write to my hearts content; till it fills the emptiness, the lack. And it is then that I feel content.
To all those whom I have troubled with my pessimism, I hereby apologize. But I promise, that I will continue.!